HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
