I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
my liver is dry heaving
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
