whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
