Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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