It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
