I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
