i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize