You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
