Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
