Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
