Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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