I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
