You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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