Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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