Sponge bath it is.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize