Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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