if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize