No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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