guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
My vagina just recognized that song.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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