Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
