Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize