Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You're breaking my sexual little heart
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
