She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
