those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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