Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
