so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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