Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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