You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
sex in a hospital.. check
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
