great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize