That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I need to sanitize my soul.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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