I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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