would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize