FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
