Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
