Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize