why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Green mimosas i think yes
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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