Kiss
Puke
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
