Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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