i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
