You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I got inside last night via doggy door
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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