just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
