do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
The air was thick with penises
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
