At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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