You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize