So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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