Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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