Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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