i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
