Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
