Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize
