Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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