If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Randomize
